Where is the light of day?
Is it not supposed to light the way?
I shift and shudder in the dark,
The fear slowly creeping into my heart.
The silence is agony; beating on the doors of death.
I curl and stop to slow my terrified breath.
Where is God’s majestic Angels to save the day?
Aren’t they to keep the darkness a bay?
The unfeeling cold covers my body with its blanket.
I scream in my mind, whatever you want just take it.
I sob and flinch to the floor.
I hope this end will not hold gore.
My life turned to such a tragedy in so short a time.
Will it ever end with a line that is mine?
Love is undetermined and somewhat wrong, from the constant obstacles that burden our souls. We follow our emotions that destroy us all and create the depressions that swallow us whole. We break apart and lose ourselves completely. Never do we try to hold on to whet makes us happy for the fear of imminent sadness. Humans are sorrowful. Pitiful beings that we are; show no sign of giving up what makes us human. However, is that a bad thing? We love and laugh. We cry and say goodbye. We lose our innocence and hold onto our pride. Emotions make us human. We imagine new lives and wondrous adventures, but most of us never strive to make it more. To make those lives a reality.
Love is determined and somewhat right. We find it in the beginning of our lives. We are held and marveled at. We are raised with kindness. We are raised to look for our dreams and to always hold hope. We are complex and simple. We are giddy in our happiness and agonized by our sadness. This is what makes us human. This is what makes our lives matter. In reality, we say goodbye quickly with very short lives. The memories we make with others and even ourselves matter most. It is only in that legacy will we carry on.
Fingers clenched the bars as she stood on the edge. It was high enough to die. Far enough to just lose herself to the water below. There was a bitter cold that nipped through the winds. She closed her eyes tightly to stop the imagination. No more thoughts of her life. No flashes of what is. Just nature’s silence. All she could hear was the water slightly crashing against the rocks. The wind’s whistle as it ruffled her hair every which way. Hands trembling as she softened her grip.
No matter how easy it was to let go; she felt rooted on the small edge. Why let go? A question she could answer quickly. Why not? That was harder. Too few reasons. The ultimate question is however; are those reasons good enough to walk away?
Eyes opened to down into the calm water. Her reflection was far and too blurry to make out. The darkened sky made the water gray. It mirrored the world around it. Thinking back, was she mirroring everything bad in her own life? What about the good times? What about everything that made life beautiful? Was she supposed to forget about it all? Was she so focused on the bad?
Everything was going downhill in her life; or so it seemed. She was going to die one day. Why not make it now? So, why is it so hard to let go? She was scared of falling. She wasn’t scared to die. She just didn’t want to. No, today was another scare. Just another battle that she had won.
Grappling the pole, she pulled herself over and hugged her jacket. Slightly smiling at the view behind her; the girl walked away from the bridge. There was a new day waiting for her tomorrow.
Depression is debilitating. It’s consuming down to your very core. You can’t ever truly escape it, but you can fight it for another day; for a new tomorrow. It feels like you’re suffocating; just like when you cry and your throat closes. When you desperately try to keep in tears because you just want it to all stop. Don’t ever stop fighting it. There is always a light at the end of the darkest tunnel; you just have to wade through the bad to find the good.
Depression is like the sea, unpredictable. It seems calm before the storm. Sometimes all you can do is go with the flow instead of fighting through the waves. Don’t ever give up; don’t ever give in. You feel like sinking; to let it all drown you.
Fight for a new tomorrow. We all have them to look forward too.